Six Words, Six Awards

You guys, thanks so much for the creativity and thought you put into your Six-Word Race Reports. My original Challenge Post garnered an all-time high of 20 comments, and a handful of you even posted your Six-Word Race Reports on your own blogs. (Mwah to you. Mwah is Frahnch for beeg keess.)Clearly, brevity is addictive since most of you couldn’t pick just one race to sum up, but rather submitted in multiples (there’s an oxymoron in there somewhere). Personally, I’m starting to believe that everything in life should be boiled down to six words or less.

Amy over at Runner’s Lounge actually tossed out my challenge to her readers for their Take It and Run Thursday column. And, a few days after I called all you bloggers out, Title Nine emailed with a link to their 6-Word Slam, asking their customers to write about “all that fitness is and does for us.” (Sounds a little woo-woo/granola to me. “Fitness” is one of those terms, which when used in an iffy context, is just a half-step removed from the similarly crunchy “balance” and “wellness.”*) Frankly, I want to know about who ran through a hailstorm, who PR’ed and who ran hungover. I don’t give a Downward Dog Pose about your “fitness.”

 Without further ado, here are the Six Best Six-Word Race Reports according to me, within categories arbitrarily designated by (once again) me:

Most Liberal Interpretation of “Six Words”
MIKE: ChampionChip tie-wrap continuosly whips leg–ouch!

Most Brutally Honest
JULIE: So hot I crapped a little.

Most Effective at Simultaneously Inciting Performance and Schwag Envy
SARAH: Won age group, six delicious rolls!

Most Clearly Written by an Athlete (as Opposed to a Mathlete)
AMY: Awful and awesome at once.

Best Insider Joke
MATT: Boston: Hartford with a good publicist.

Most Likely to Garner Approval of Non-Runners
JULIE: This wasn’t worth the ice cream.

And, the Award for Outstanding Interloper Participation Goes to…

MIKE: Too lazy. Smoke and read instead.

Congratulations running scribes! If you have a chance on Thursday, drop over to Runner’s Lounge and see what comes out of Amy’s Take It and Run Thursday… sounds promising to me!

*Actually, my real gripe is that Title Nine sells too many cutie-pie outfits and not enough technical clothing for endurance athletes. What’s up with this matchy-matchy? I don’t want to race in a shirt and shorts that have coordinating dogwood branch patterns. But Title Nine does get props for being the only joint that sells a sports bra in my size, and for their general positive portrayal for female athletes, even if all their models are skinnier than I was at age 12.