Some of you may have heard of this book, Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six-Word Memoirs by Famous & Obscure Writers. It is exactly what it says it is, and the memoirs are hilarious, poignant, universal and quixotically specific. I don’t own the book, I just enjoy watching the video (embedded below). When I am supremely bored (read: in a meeting), I write my own six-word memoirs, coming at my life from all different angles. Today, I had to sit through two back-to-back BS sessions that had me wishing I’d develop stigmata, Tourette’s Syndrome, or maybe a left elbow that popped everytime I bent it–something, anything to amuse me and those around me. I finally gave up and honed my six-word memoirs to such a fine point that I decided to try for the six-word race report. I wrote my memoirs, then I ghost-wrote the memoirs of some of the American elite runners who have taken part in the Olympic Trials. Herewith, my six-word efforts:
TK: Pigtails flying, panting notwithstanding, I PR’ed.
Brian Sell: I ran away from dental school.
Christian Smith: The track burn was worth it.
Kara Goucher: Who said I’ve got no kick?
Jordan Hasay: Finals now, London in four years.
Aren’t you inspired? If you could describe your last race, or your first race, or your best race, which six words would you use to tell the story? I challenge you to post your own six-word race report, either in the comments here, or on your own blog. And just so you’re not all looking around in cyberspace saying Huh, who, me? I am calling you out, bloggers. Sarah, Laura, Julie, Laminator, Dada, Paul, Alejandro, Rob, Andrew, ben and Jeremy, Chia, Amy, SF, Robert, Uptown Girl, Staci, 1Mile, FlyGirl, Mike, Robert, JC, Ryan, Phil, Paul, Candy, Bryan, Kevin et al.: I want to read your six-word race report! And to the rest of you who read this blog and sometimes comment, now is your chance to blow us all away with your eloquence, wit, originality and racing chops. I wanna see those six-word race reports all over the comment section. What else do you all have to do at work all day, anyway?
Here’s the video:
Oh yeah, and my run home from work today was an encouraging return to form. 3.5 miles in 32:19.
Race report from my first full marathon (Vermont City – ’08, 4:48:37)
“Poetry in motion, everyone but me.”
Orlando humidity makes 26.2 so difficult
BK 1/2 rocked; bring on Queens!
Wonderful idea! And I love the ones you put together for some of the elites.
Well, I’m throwing all propriety to the wind and sharing my most embarassing racing moment thus far. Here’s my race report from the Fairfield Half in late June (offering some insight into why I’ve sworn off racing in extremely hot and humid weather):
“So hot I crapped a little.”
What? Too much information? You asked!
I’ll think up a few more on my lunch hour. When I’m not eating.
Dexter-Ann Arbor 10K and A Most Excellent Race 5K: “Personal records fueled by alcoholic beverages.”
Marine Corps Historic Half Marathon:
“Seven hour drive, sub 2-hour PR!” (is that too many words?)
Ann Arbor Turkey Trot 5K:
“32:58 in 2007, 25:01 in 2008.”
Run For The Rolls 1-Mile:
“Won age group, six delicious rolls!”
Big House Big Heart 5K:
“Finish inside Michigan Stadium? I’M THERE!”
Meteor 10K:
“First 10K race means automatic PR.”
Shamrocks and Shenanigans 5K:
“Broke high school PR. I ROCK!”
Detroit Half Marathon 2007:
“First half marathon. I did it.”
Went the wrong way, still PR’d.
🙂 great challenge 🙂
Boston Marathon: It’s Hartford with a good publicist
My last 5k : I finally found my speed again
2007 Vermont City Marathon (multiple):
I drove eight hours to suffer.
This wasn’t worth the ice cream.
2008 More Marathon (multiple):
Cracked the top 10 as promised.
Loop four or five? Lost count.
2008 Mini 10K:
At least I’m not running Beijing.
NYC Marathon 2006:
2 million spectators cheering for me
Nike 26.2 2004:
Conquered the hills in San Francisco
NYC 1/2 2006:
Got drenched running through Times Square
Rock & Roll 1/2 San Diego:
PR’ed then lost my voice cheering
4 Miler in Central Park where my cousin beat me by 2 steps:
Lost steam late; defeat tastes bitter
Revlon 5k – My first race ever and I met my ex:
Love strikes twice…which will last?
5th Ave Mile:
Holy Shit! 1 mile is long.
Here’s a few from me! Fun stuff.
My last race (can’t even remember what event it was):
My future wife is watching me.
800m HS Cal State Championships at 400m (against Michael Granville – 1:46.45 in HS?!):
55 seconds and in last place…
4x100m Lead off Leg:
What am I doing here? Anyone?
Memorable Training Run…50K through Queens.
We are doing this again tomorrow!
Posted mine on my blog: http://absolutlyfit.blogspot.com/2008/07/tagged-six-word-memoirs.html
Too lazy: smoke and read instead.
Today:
Half marathon. Full intensity. Love it!
[…] marathon. Full intensity. Love it!” TK from Pigtails Flying issued a challenge to come up with a six-word description of a recent race, and I felt mine from […]
Here’s Mine.
2005 NYC Marathon – Cramped and crawled, but finished strong.
2006 Hartford Marathon – In the end, wall and hills galore.
2007 NYC Marathon – Newbie no more, my first BQ!
Thanks for the motivation.
What a super fabulous idea! I think mine from this weekend would be something like,
“Awful and awesome at once.”
NYC NIKE Half Marathon 2007 – Running Down Seventh Avenue – Incredibly Cool.
Half-marathons in general: Challenging. Memories of pain fade quickly.
Oh, I see. You don’t call me out. What, you don’t think I race?
OK, I don’t. But, I did run a mile a day in the Texas heat during basketball off-season when I was 16. Here are six word memoirs for certain of those miles.
The first mile: “Felt pain. Told coach I couldn’t.”
A mile several weeks later: “Gave my all. Finished in 5:38.”
One of the last miles: “Stopped caring so much. Still, finished.”
Whoa! What a surprise to be called out on your blog. Thank you for including me with such wonderful company!
I’m no writer (Mathematics major in undergrad), but I’ll try a few….
Riley’s Rumble Half Marathon (7/27/08)
“Walked hills; 13.1 never felt better”
Frederick (MD) Marathon (5/4/08 – my first 26.2)
“Traffic jam? No problem – chip timed”
“PRed first 13.1; painful second half”
“Frederick – where cows come to cheer!”
Riley’s Rumble Half Marathon (7/29/07)
“I shouldn’t have run those hills”
Thomas Labrecque Classic DC (9/17/06)
“ChampionChip tie-wrap continuously whips leg – Ouch!”
Kentlands 5K (9/3/2005)
“First sub 30 minute 5K – HOORAY!”
Fun!!
Here’s some good…
NYC Marathon 2006:
“Living a dream, doing it well.”
Broad Street Run 2008:
“The definition of a perfect race.”
And one not-so-good :)…
NY Mini 10K 2008:
“Mother Nature f*cks with us again!”
[…] guys, thanks so much for the creativity and thought you put into your Six-Word Race Reports. My original Challenge Post garnered an all-time high of 20 comments, and a handful of you even posted your Six-Word Race […]
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